godgirl's blog

Flickr: D Sharon Pruitt

Man, there’s just something that I just can’t let go of and I don’t know why.  And yup, it deals with a matter of the heart.  I’ve been praying about it constantly to God and am asking for him to dig up the root so we can cast it away…but it still torments me.

I’m understanding that I am controlling this issue and it’s me that has to keep prying my hands off it.  My knuckles are white from my firm grasp on it…and I keep examining myself to see what it is that makes me think my life is better by holding on to it.

Have you ever had something you just can’t seem to let go of?  It’s painful, emotionally painful.

I also think that the reason why I am holding on to it is because I am pouting that I didn’t get my way.  It’s not fun when you don’t get your way in life. I wish I was one of those people who could just accept that and move on quickly…but I’m not quite there yet.

I am trying to learn how to accept my circumstances and realize they are the best for me.  But, I’m struggling with that I have to admit.

So, I’m throwing myself in God’s arms, as mentioned in the last post, and I’m trying to deal with my situation and not shoving it down. I’m letting it hurt with the hopes that one day I will have a breakthrough and it will be gone.

I have to hold onto God’s words and trust Him in all things. He cares for me and understands where I’m at.  And when I run to him, the pain does numb…

Matthew 11:28-30 (New International Version)

²⁸“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. ²⁹Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. ³⁰For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

I get it…but it still hurts.  Do hearts ever mend I wonder?

In his good care,

Cindy

Go ahead and Say No

I am just learning that it’s OK to say no.  That is if that is what you are hearing from God.  I’ve always thought, especially when someone needed help and especially when my church had a request that I had to say yes.  But, I’m learning that it is not necessarily the right thing to do.  Often No is the appropriate answer, even if it kills you to say it.

I mean if someone in your family always requests money and you have it to give to them – should you give it? Or should you help them by saying this time you need to take care of your issue and try and get a job?

Or if you don’t feel that you have time for something and you add it to your schedule anyway-should you?

Or in my case, I am on a quest to land a job and although I have more free time than usual, is it the best use of my time to volunteer as I see fit?  That answer is No.  I’m learning that if I don’t take care of my issues – then no one will.  And they are my issues and I don’t want to make them anyone else’s.

I am trying to follow God’s path for me right now and obeying even if it means I do less at church which feels so foreign to me.  But right now he wants me to train and learn – so that’s what I am doing.  In doing so, I have to say “no” to many things and that’s new to me.  I test everything in prayer and often I get a resounding feeling in my soul that it’s the right thing. When I don’t hear a definite no or yes from him, then I error on the side of  “no” not yes.  It seems to be working well.

So go ahead and say no and remember rejection isn’t anything more than direction.  No has many positive consequences, especially when we say No to temptation.  No has power to overcome hurtful behaviors. It really should be thought of as a positive word and action don’t you think?

Jesus said no many times.  He said no to the devil three times when tempted. He said no one can come through the Father except through him.  We must though never waiver in our decision for as Jesus said – it’s so on point….

Simply let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one. Matt 5:37

Would you have said yes or no to the apple?

The Israelites Were Seldom Content

In reading through the bible in the year plan that I am on – I got convicted today Big Time.  I’m in Exodus 16 and I’m walking along the Israelites and reading about their problems.  They keep telling their leader, Moses, that they are not happy with his leadership which has been directed by God.  Everywhere they turn they forget about his past huge miracle, the parting of the Red Sea, and all they do is whine about is their lack of food, water and protection. Waaa. Waaa. Waaa.  I’d be complaining too.

But it was this one line that really convicted me – it was Moses’ wise answer to their complaints for meat with their potatoes.

…the Lord has heard all your complaints against him.  What have we done?  Yes, your complaints are against the Lord, not against us.  v 8

So my take away this morning was that all of my complaints really are not against a person, place or thing – they are really against God and my lack of faith that he doesn’t know what is best for me. For example, when I get upset when the lines are too long in the grocery store or when I can’t find a parking spot, my complaint really is against God for not making my life easier.  When in fact, he may want me to wait to minister to someone in the grocery line, or may want me to not to be in harm’s way in the parking lot.  It all is for his good.

The thing I complain about the most is my singleness.  What I am really doing is verbally saying that I am not happy with how God is leading my life.

I need to stop complaining. How about you? In our church service today we recited the Serenity prayer and it was a longer version than I am accustom.  But, it’s right on target and I’m going to leave you with these words.

THE SERENITY PRAYER

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

–Reinhold Niebuhr

What do we really need to complain to God about? His lack of love for us-no He loves unconditionally and most likely more than we love our ourselves?

Do you have any complaints?

A Powerful Force of Love

I have a radical pastor who gets right to the heart of matters.  He’s aware that we’re living in a troubled economy. He gets it that some are barely making their rents.  He knows that the holidays are tough in so many ways. He knows that we experience pain and that life can be tough. But…he also knows that despite what problem the world has created that there is an antidote. This antidote is something we each possess and can call upon at a moment’s notice.  Are you ready to hear it?

The antidote is Love.

Love is the answer. ♥ To love and be loved. Is there anything else that really matters?

It’s the relationships in our life that count.

God kept putting the word tsunami in my pastor’s mind and it wasn’t until recently that he understood what God meant.  God wanted him to challenge his church members to create a groundswell, a tsunami of love.  He challenged us to tell at least five people a day that we loved them.  And its working. You should try it. I can’t tell you how wonderful it has been when around others at church to hear those three little words as I’m walking the campus. I can’t help but stop for a second and smile when I hear it from someone.

Like a tsunami, love is a powerful force.  When was the last time you’ve told your wife or husband that you love them?  How about your mom or dad?  Or that neighbor that watches over your house for you while on vacation?  Or how about your pastor or Sunday school leader?

I totally get what he means that though we are small, we can do all things, especially with the use of social media these days – the tsunami of love can extend beyond our church.  Though we are just a little speck on Google maps, the spark of love from this spot can ripple to the four corners of the earth.  Won’t you join us and spread this tsunami of love this holiday season?

It doesn't take much to let a person know that they matter to you. (Credit: Ronaldo F. Cabuhet/Flickr)

My pastor said something today that saddened me a bit. He stated that if we were one of the mega-churches in our area and we did this it would probably make the news and he’s right.  But, that’s what is so wonderful about God.  God works in amazing, unseen ways and although we are small he is mighty.  For all we need for you is to tell two friends and so on and so on and so on.  So if you are reading this and you’re on Facebook, go ahead and put in your status that you love your friends this holiday season.  Those who choose to be your Facebook friends are people who value you and your input. You matter to them.  Tell them to tell their friends too.  Let’s spread this giant tidal wave for love is the only answer.

Find people to love on and watch the tsumani that comes back.

Be sure to share some of your stories with me okay.  I’d love to hear about whom you love and about those who love you.

I love you.

Cindy